“To know yourself, you must sacrifice the illusion that you already do.”
Vironika Tugaleva
I always have something to learn.
I always have something to learn.
I. Always. Have. Something. To. Learn.
This Day in 2018:
And Then There Was a Rattlesnake
Well whaddya know. More shit hits the fan.
Chris was on a walk with the dogs this morning and Max thought that a rattlesnake was going to be his friend…even after the snake warned them all with its rattle. So while he is being struck, twice (because the first two warnings weren’t warning enough), in the mayhem, Ginger also gets struck. Chris’ adrenaline is flying high. Max isn’t listening and coming. He has to drag Max away from the snake and walk a third of a mile back to the car with two dogs with snake venom coursing their veins, not knowing what’s gonna happen to them. He gets them to the car, calls me, and gets them to an emergency vet. Snake venom isn’t necessarily fatal if proper interventions are employed so Chris and I don’t feel right about putting the dogs down (and the girls would not have handled that well at all) but we also don’t feel great about incurring a multi-thousand dollar treatment plan. Yet another unnecessary and expensive disaster in the midst of all we’re already dealing with.
I have to ask the Lord, “Why? Why this. Why now. Why them. Why both dogs. Why the expense. Why?” I so don’t know how to feel. And neither does the rest of my family. We are all “off” and edgy and acting out in all different ways. Am I mad? Relieved? Worried? Guilty? Confused? Despondent? Probably all of the above.
I guess this is the risk we take and the price we pay because we choose to have dogs…….but we really could have done without this…. Really.
(I am so grateful Chris wasn’t the one struck…that would have done me in. That said, I’m still pretty livid that this had to happen at all…)
This Day in 2019:
Magnificent Niagara
Niagara Falls is the most incredible thing I have ever seen in my life. Wow. There are few words to truly describe its magnificence
That said, I have asked my body to do too much…way more than it has done in two years. And I’m feeling it. I can barely walk, I have a dreadful headache, my eyes and neck and back are screaming and I’m so nauseous from being over-exhausted.
I cried today, so so furious at cancer. And then my Haleigh looked at me and said that she was so glad to be on vacation with me. My response: “I’m glad I’m alive to be here, too, love.” While I am so not feeling well tonight, I am deeply grateful I’m here with my family, enjoying every second.
No Post for 7/28/20