What does it mean when everything important happens to conflict with everything that is important? Like literally, in these past few weeks, I’ll go to put some important thing on my calendar and there, in that same slot, is another really important thing. And guys! I don’t have a super full calendar!!?! It’s not like I have these slivers of time to slide things into…and it’s not like I think every thing is everything. I no longer overschedule myself nor do I overextend. There are 365 days in the year. And COME ON…the really important things can’t spread themselves out??
So, I’m left with asking myself that question: what does it mean? If it were one or two things, I’d call it coincidental. But when it’s literally all of the things? What purpose could there possibly be?
It’s hard to show up in the Present when there are 2 Presents to show up to.
Speak Beautiful Truth :: June 3, 2018
Today was as “normal” as it could have been. Church. Costco. The library. Family time. Organizing the week ahead…..And I felt pretty good all day, too.
A couple of things I want to note that came throughout my day:
1. A friend texted me with this quote:
“The only things faithful people can lose in suffering are things that are finally expendable. The real you, the one God is creating, cannot be harmed.” (Philippians 1:6, 2 Corinthians 3:18, 2 Corinthians 4:16-17). Tim Keller
2. Something my pastor said this morning in his sermon:
“Every day, look for traces of grace and find reasons for gratitude.” Kurt Vetterling
I am thankful to experience life with people that speak beautiful truth.
Sad :: June 3, 2019
I’m just sad tonight. My whole being is heavy. I’m sad because cancer has taken so much. I’m sad because of how purely exhausted I am. I’m sad because I have to take medicine that makes me feel awful but my alternative is the unknown of cancer coming back. I’m sad because I haven’t had “a break” from the hard for years. I’m sad because the further I get from surgery, the more clear it’s getting that I’m gonna have to settle and accept a human’s best effort. I’m sad because this is my reality. I’m just sad.
No post for 6/3/20